Training Exercise
by legalliz
Summary: Just a fun little one-shot featuring Stephanie and Ranger. Enjoy!


_As always, the characters and settings belong to the delightful Janet Evanovich._

I leaned up against my apartment door as I reached for my keys to unlock it. My legs felt like jello, and my shoulders still ached from all the stress I'd been channeling through them over the last few hours. I frowned at the trail of wet spots leading to my door before I finally opened it and stumbled inside.

My clothes were soaked through, and I knew before catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror that I needed a shower, but my legs simply refused to go any further than the kitchen. I slumped over a chair and sighed. Once I'd mustered up a last boost of energy to shower, it was time to throw on some dry, comfy clothes and crash on the couch.

I had just pushed myself into an upright standing position again when I heard my phone ring. The thought crossed my mind to shut the stupid thing off until I caught a glimpse of who was calling. I decided to answer it.

"What's up?" I asked.

"You sound tired." No kidding.

"It's been a long day. Did you need something?"

"Babe."

I sighed. "You know what I mean."

"Not in the mood for small talk, I take it."

"Like I said, it's been a long day."

"I'll get to the point then. I need your help with a training exercise."

"A training exercise."

"Yes."

"What if I decline? I think I've had enough on-site training today to last me a lifetime."

"It's your decision, but I'll pay you for it."

It was no big secret that I could always use a little extra cash. I groaned realizing I was probably going to take the dangling carrot.

"I'll take the enthusiastic groan as confirmation that you'll do it." I could tell from his tone that I was amusing him.

"Fine. But this doesn't involve shooting anyone, right?"

"Only if you can catch them."

"Wait, what?"

"I'll fill you in on the details tomorrow. Can you make it here by 8:00?"

Mentally I might be able to handle 8:00, but my muscles thought I should go into hibernation mode for a while until they were fully recovered. "9:00 would be better."

"How about 8:30 and I throw in some coffee and donuts."

"Ok," I sighed. "8:30 it is."

"Good. See you tomorrow, babe."

Training exercise, huh? I knew I was in no shape for exercises, training or otherwise. Especially anything organized by Ranger. I'm pretty sure he equated all the combat and fitness crap with fun. At least I'd be getting paid for it, right?

My alarm chirped promptly at 8:00 AM the next morning. I rolled out of bed, tugged on some yoga pants and a t-shirt, tied my hair into a frizzy ponytail, tossed on a ball cap and deemed myself more or less ready to go. No point in applying makeup for a training exercise, right?

I half-walked half-stumbled my way out to the parking lot and crawled in my car. There was a coffee already waiting in my drink holder. And it was still warm. I grabbed my phone and called Ranger.

"Well played," I said before stifling a yawn.

"Figured you'd need a little morning incentive. I've got the donuts here waiting for you upon arrival."

"Smart move."

"See you in a few."

I pulled into the Rangeman garage just as the clock on my dash showed 8:32. Two minutes behind schedule. Hopefully that wouldn't result in any additional training exercises as punishment.

I took the elevator up to the base of operations and searched the floor for familiar faces. Ranger's office was empty, and there were only a few guys in Rangeman black uniforms roaming around. Guess everyone was out making their morning rounds.

The elevator opened again and Tank, Ranger's second in command, walked onto the floor. He waved me over and handed me a piece of paper.

"He's waiting for you upstairs."

I raised a skeptical eyebrow. It hadn't occurred to me to think of the "training exercise" as a euphemism, but now I was starting to think that meeting with Ranger alone on the seventh floor probably meant something completely different than what I had been imagining. Oh boy.

"It's all in the note," Tank added.

I decided to read it alone in the elevator in case the message made me blush. Which ended up being unnecessary. It was typed and to the point. Not a single innuendo included.

"Catch me if you can," it read. "Use your instincts."

Instincts. Ha, that was a good one. I let myself into Ranger's apartment and wondered what exactly he had planned for the "catch me if you can" game. My answer was waiting for me on the kitchen table: a nerf gun and a walkie talkie.

I turned the walkie talkie on and pressed the "talk" button. "You've gotta be kidding me."

There was a beat of silence and some crackling static before I heard a response. "Nope."

I found the donuts sitting on the counter and took a giant bite out of one. The sugar rush started to improve my mood a little, but I still wasn't thrilled about this particular training exercise. Ranger outranked me in agility, stealth, intelligence and strength. Tracking him down with a nerf gun was like a chicken hunting a fox.

"What if I decide to take the donuts and leave?" I asked.

"You'd be a spoilsport. And you wouldn't get the prize at the end." Thankfully the com static prevented my gigantic sigh from crossing the airwaves. "Are you in?" he asked.

"Do I really have a choice?"

"No."

"Then I guess I'm in."

"Alright then. The game's restricted to the building. Catch me if you can, babe." The walkie talkie went silent. I sat in a kitchen chair eating another donut and pondering my find-the-impossible-man strategy.

It was probably best to start my search from ground zero by casing Ranger's actual apartment. When I would play hide-and-seek as a kid, I always hid in places that were kind of obvious like under the beds, behind the doors, or in the bathtub. I guess everyone assumed you'd find a better place to hide than something like that, so as long as you could stifle your giggles as your pursuers walked by, you could go hours before someone ever found you.

I peeked under Ranger's bed, in his closet, and even under the cupboards in his bathroom. No such luck. Of course Ranger wouldn't make the game _that_ easy. There were still six other floors to investigate. I assumed he wouldn't be on the floors with the safe apartments, so that left the Rangeman floor, the garage, the gym, and possibly Ella's apartment. There was the firing range too, but that felt a little too on-the-nose. I decided I'd leave it as a last resort.

It was time to start thinking like Ranger. Except the problem was that I hardly ever thought like Ranger. We had completely different strategies for tracking people. Ranger used his state-of-the-art databases and intimidating Schwarzenegger-like appearance to quickly apprehend people. I used the Jersey gossip network, dumb luck, and hairspray. The databases gave me an idea though.

Ranger was constantly tracking me. It was mostly a safety precaution since I often found myself in some less-than-ideal situations, but today I was going to try and use it to my advantage to snag myself a fox. A stealthy, sneaky, and super sexy fox.

I made my way back to the bedroom and started stripping. I ditched the pants, the hat, the shirt, my watch, and even my earrings. Then I stuffed them all as best I could in my hand bag and started rummaging through the walk-in closet for something to wear.

As expected, nothing fit right, but now wasn't the time to start whining about clothing malfunctions. I grabbed a black t-shirt and tied a knot at the waist, which kept it mostly in place. The bottom half was going to be a little trickier. After a little digging around, I found a pair of black athletic pants that I cinched up around my waist hoping the day wouldn't involve too much running. My shoes could still be a problem, so I decided to leave them behind and go barefoot.

As I left the bedroom, I gave myself a quick once-over in the mirror. The attire was ridiculous, but I guess it didn't really matter. As long as it was effective. With the wardrobe change complete, it was time to continue on to the next part of my plan.

I decided I needed to pay a visit to the lovely Ella. I took the elevator down to the floor where she lived, and smiled when she opened her door on the second knock. Her eyes took in my strange appearance, but she didn't comment on it nor frown in disapproval.

"What brings you by today?" she asked sweetly.

"I have a small favor to ask you."

"Consider it already done."

I knew I liked that woman. I handed her my hand bag with the clothes along with my shoes.

"It would be great if you could keep this stuff with you today while you make your cleaning rounds."

She gave me a brief puzzled expression before shrugging her shoulders. "Ok. Anything else?"

"I think that should do it. I really appreciate it." She smiled sweetly again before saying goodbye.

"Oh, one more thing," I added before turning to head back down the hall. "Have you seen Ranger on this floor with a nerf gun?"

"Not today, dear," she said before shutting the door. The response threw me for a moment. I had a hard time imagining Ranger using anything other than a real weapon. I'd just assumed he'd recently purchased the toys to amuse himself at my expense. The fact that he'd been seen on more than one occasion with a toy gun was kind of comical. Boys will be boys, I guess.

I was still snickering to myself about the whole nerf gun thing as I made my way to the next stop on my strategic itinerary. Things were still moderately slow on the Rangeman floor, which mostly worked to my advantage. I poked my head back in Ranger's office and drew my gun as I peeked under his desk. It wasn't really all that surprising that he wasn't there.

After waking the computer from sleep mode, I propped my feet up on the desk and leaned back in the comfy office chair. The next part of my plan could officially be titled "waiting." I pulled up the security feeds from the different floors, and scanned them for movement.

Ella started making her rounds, which hopefully provided the cover I was counting on. If Ranger thought I was busy scouring the floors trying to find him, then he might get a little sloppy and get caught on one of the well-planted security cameras. I also had a backup plan in case that didn't pan out.

Surprise, surprise. Twenty minutes dragged slowly by without a single sign of Ranger. It was time for plan B.

I wasn't exactly sure where Ranger was hiding, but I was fairly confident he hadn't been moving around much. Unless he'd somehow managed to crawl into the air ducts. To be honest, I wouldn't put it past him, but it didn't feel like something he'd do today.

Despite my best efforts, I was starting to feel a little more confident with my natural instincts. Since this was all a silly game anyway, the pressure to be accurate with said instincts wasn't there. The mere thrill of the hunt and my slight competitive side were all that really kept me moving forward. But it _was_ starting to get later in the day, and I was feeling ready to wrap this whole thing up.

After some careful consideration, I decided my instincts were going to lead me to the garage. It was dark, there were numerous places to hide, and there were several access points for surprise entrances or hasty retreats. This didn't exactly help me narrow down where exactly Ranger might be hiding, but I had the beginnings of an idea that might lure a tricky fox into the hen house.

I grabbed my gun from the desk and decided to take the emergency stairs down to the garage. It was cool and quiet, and I half expected Ranger to be waiting for me at the bottom of the stairwell. Fortunately he wasn't, so I slipped into the garage and glanced around. There wasn't any movement, but I was feeling pretty good about my instincts because I suddenly felt a rush like I always did when Ranger was nearby. Guess it was time to put my plan into action.

Normally you don't make a lot of commotion when you're trying to sneak up on someone, but you sure do if you want that person to know exactly where you are. I bolted across the garage toward my target, hoping I'd be faster than any nerf darts if they started flying after me. I opened the industrial dumpster as loudly as possible and clanged and banged around a few more times for good measure.

"I got you!" I yelled loud enough to hear my voice reverberate off the concrete walls. I leaned over the side after stealing a quick glance behind me and tumbled into the garbage bags with an ear-piercing shriek. The lid slammed shut on me leaving me in total darkness. I sure hoped I wasn't wrong about all of this.

I moaned and groaned loudly after yelling a few expletives then felt a sudden rush of relief when I heard the footsteps running toward the dumpster.

"Shit," I heard Ranger say as he lifted the dumpster lid. "Stephanie, are you ok?"

I was laying on my back, gun aimed and ready. "Gotcha," I said with a smirk as I emptied all my nerf rounds into Ranger's chest. He had a brief look of surprise before he grabbed his chest and pretended to fall over dead.

I stood up and looked over the edge of the dumpster. Ranger was laughing on the ground.

"Well played, babe. Well played." It was the best compliment I'd been given in a while.

I hoisted myself out of the dumpster and started picking garbage bits off my clothes. "Your emotions betray you, young Jedi," I said with a smile.

"So they do," he said pulling something gunky from my hair. It gave me a shiver. "I liked your strategy to use Ella."

"It wasn't good enough to fool you."

"I've been doing this particular training exercise for a while. There aren't many strategies that fool me anymore. But I'm sure if anyone's capable of coming up with something new and out of the box, it would be you."

I felt my face warm slightly at the compliment.

"What tipped you off that I was in the garage?" he asked.

"Just a feeling. I was doing the training exercise as instructed. Following my instincts."

"What are your instincts telling you now?" he asked with a seductive grin while pulling me into his arms.

I glanced down at my clothes. "My instincts are telling me I'm in desperate need of a shower and probably a change of clothes."

"Hmm. I'm getting the shower vibe too, but I'm thinking the change of clothing might be a little unnecessary. At least for a while." He tugged my arm back toward the elevator. Maybe training exercises weren't all that bad after all.


End file.
